Self-love seems to be everyone’s lifelong pursuit. We all strive to reach a point where we can say that no matter what “I unconditionally love myself”. 

Self love is a great concept but if you’re constantly pinching yourself in the mirror to measure your imperfections, self love can feel impossible. Being a perfectionist, this drove me CRAZY.  If I am being honest and vulnerable, it did not matter if I was at my lowest weight or my highest weight, I never had that self-love. . ⁣⁣

I think most people struggle to love themselves and this can seem like failure in a world that is making self love into a commodity.  I would love to say I love my body all the time; but sometimes the best I can do is simply accept it.My goals have changed over the course of my Eating Disorder recovery. My goal is no longer to unconditionally love myself but to start with accepting myself . 

Here are my three pieces of advice when it comes to self acceptance:

  1.  Try to look at yourself more neutrally. I know that as I look in the mirror, my instant reaction is to pick out each flaw I see; my eating disorder thoughts try to creep back in. It feels silly to try to deceive my brain and change “I hate my stomach” to “ I love my stomach”. It feels meaningless to say something I truly don’t believe at the time. It’s much more rational to look in the mirror before a night out and say, “I’m having a really hard time loving my body, but I can and will continue to simply take care of it and let it be.” A stomach is a stomach and there is fat there to protect organs. Arms are just Arms. Legs are just Legs. They don’t serve the purpose of being “pretty” or “perfect” , they are there to be strong and to help live a full life. 
  2. Show up. After struggling for years, I’ve realized that confidence is not about what I look like. It’s not about the nicest butt or the smallest waist. Confidence is derived from what I consistently decide to think, act, and show up in this world regardless of how I feel.  ⁣
  3. Embrace the power you have within. We have the ability to decide what we want to think and how we want to feel about ourselves.  You do not need to reach some level of self love like a graduation date or a promotion at work. Extend yourself compassion and allow self acceptance to be enough. Your mind is a powerful tool; use it.

 So how are you going to choose to feel and think about yourself today? I choose to accept my body and be proud of how far I’ve come. The more I’ve accepted my body, the less focused on it, I am. And still.. there are some days where I’m just like, “wow I hate this”⁣

And then I keep going anyway because there’s more to life than my jean size.

^._.^ Mak | @makfoss