The first step to getting a therapist is deciding to get one.
Now, I’m not here to tell you when you need to reach out for professional help, all I know is my experience. I reached out to start therapy when I started having panic attacks, I was scared and confused about the physical symptoms that come along with panic. Now as a long term beneficiary of therapy, I understand that its uses go far beyond treating mental health challenges. It also helps with goal setting, improving relationships, gaining insight into your life experience, and improving your overall well being. I like to think that if you think you may benefit from therapy, you probably would. And if you think you wouldn’t benefit from seeing a therapist, you probably would benefit from it anyway. There is something refreshing and relieving about having a trained professional to help you navigate this complex world.
Once you decide you want to find a therapist, there is a surprisingly large amount of barriers to overcome. It can be daunting to start the process of finding a therapist that fits well in your life, and it’s possible. I have done it several times between graduating, moving, moving again, not finding the right fit, etc., etc. I have been tasked with finding a therapist several times. And everytime I found someone. Here’s whatcha gotta do:
Overcoming The Stigma
Therapy often has a bad rap. Society likes to tell us that going to therapy means that you’ve failed or that there is something wrong with you. Therapy means the opposite! Therapy means you believe in yourself and your goals enough to get the resources to help you get where you want to be. In my opinion, nothing is as sexy as someone who knows what they want and how to get it. Therefore, therapy is sexy.
Also, your journey with therapy is personal. You don’t have to tell anyone you’re going to therapy you don’t feel safe telling someone. You get to decide what role therapy plays in your life, not others.
Affording Therapy
The first obstacle is cost. Therapy can be expensive. If you don’t have insurance, finding health care is even more daunting. But here’s the good part- there are many places that offer sliding scale rates based on your income. Offices that don’t offer sliding scales often have places to refer you to that can be helpful. I’ve personally used my local university’s resources. They offered free therapy while I was a student and also had a free clinic once I graduated as long as you’re comfortable seeing a student who is supervised by a professor.
If you do have insurance, you can often log onto your provider’s website and locate therapists who are covered by your policy. This is my go-to method.
Also, you can talk to your Primary Care physician who can point you in the right direction!
Finding Availability
Mental health services have limited availability, and they often have wait lists. My suggestion is to call as many places you can in one sitting. This does a few things- It allows you to get on wait lists if there are ones, uses the momentum from one call to call other places, and utilizes the tip you’ll see in Find in the Right Fit of shopping around.
Do Your Research
Therapists often have specialities such as Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, trauma, LGBTQ+ support, addiction, really anything you can think of. Finding a therapist that specializes in your area of need is a great way to set yourself up for success in therapy.
Additionally, there are therapists with different types of educational backgrounds. Some are social workers, some are psychologists, and some offer both talk therapy and psychiatry.
Ask for Support
A huge barrier for finding a therapist for me is symptoms of my anxiety and depression. Sometimes I have no motivation, sometimes my heart starts beating so fast at the thought of making a phone call that it feels impossible. This is where you can find a supportive person to help you out. This can be a friend, religious leader, parent, whoever you feel comfortable talking with. Maybe you know someone who goes to therapy and can help you out in the process of getting a therapist.
Find the right fit
After you overcome the obstacles of getting an appointment you are almost there! Next is making sure the therapist is a good fit for you. My previous therapist told me that building rapport with therapists can take up to 6-8 weeks. So my first tip is to give it some time. You may not want to spill your guts to a complete stranger, and that’s okay. Give yourself a few sessions in order to get comfortable.
Don’t be afraid to talk to your therapist about your relationship with them, check in on how things are going. They are used to having these conversations and it can aid in strengthening the relationship.
Lastly, don’t be afraid to shop around for the right person for you. You can ask if they offer consultations or intake appointments multiple places, go to several first sessions, and make the choice from there. You are never committed to a therapist, you can always change.
Getting the right therapist for you may seem overwhelming. But you can do this. If you are interested in therapy, you owe it to yourself to give it a try. I believe most everyone can benefit from it. Use these tips to guide you through the process and know that you are capable of getting the help you need. Empower yourself, you got this!
Written by Havah Roussel