Unless you’ve been living under a rock (and perhaps not even then), you know that America is going through a major crisis right now. Every day, more evidence of the issues of systemic racism and internal biases is brought to the public eye, igniting debates and hard discussions on many platforms and in many homes. However, many young people feel uncomfortable discussing such sensitive subjects with generations older than them. If you find yourself struggling to voice your opinion, here are some tips to start those conversations.
Be Informed
One of the biggest concerns younger people have when debating with older people is looking like they don’t have all the facts and being proven wrong. The easiest way to avoid that is to spend the time researching the issues. Look at statistics, personal testimonies, and studies with a critical eye to avoid falling victim to heavily biased information. Look at what both sides of the debate are saying, so that you can form arguments to combat the other side’s information. One of the most common (and foolish) arguments I’ve heard from the Boomer generation is that we are just kids who don’t know any better because we’re too young. You’re never “too young” to know about the world around you. We also should not be so afraid of being corrected. New information comes out every day, making it impossible for us to know everything. We need to normalize changing our opinions when new information is given to us, and to accept those who previously held harmful beliefs but now acknowledge and are correcting their wrongs.
Listen to BIPOC
As a white person, you will never fully understand what BIPOC (black, indeginous, and people of color) go through on a daily basis. Listening to people of color discuss what they have experienced and how it has affected them is a great way to become more educated on the issues they face due to systemic racism. Learning about racism from white people gives you a limited view on all that there is to learn, so seeking out books, articles, poems, etc. written by the people that racism affects is incredibly important. Some great authors to seek out include Maya Angelou, Langston Hughes, Ijeoma Oluo, Ibram X. Kendi, and Danez Smith. The same goes for organizations created by people of color, such as the Black Lives Matter movement and the Know Your Rights Campaign.
Respond Accordingly to Your Audience
Black Lives Matter is not a political statement. The advancement of black people’s rights and freedoms does not mean an attack on white people’s rights and freedoms, however some people don’t see it that way. Perhaps it’s because history has shown us time and time again that the advancement of white people required the oppression of black people, or perhaps they simply are unaware of the privileges they have because of their skin, but regardless of the reason they deny that statement, it is our responsibility to help them realize the harm behind “all lives matter.” These conversations are hard for white people to have because many people think that if they are labeled as ignorant they are being labeled as racist. Keeping calm during these conversations can be tough, but it is important to not blame or attack when discussing the issues so as to have an effective conversation. Nothing gets accomplished on either side when you are simply attacking one another. Of course, that does not apply to people who are openly racist (or homophobic, xenophobic, transphobic, misogynistic, etc.). It is our responsibility to have these conversations with our friends and families to help educate them, but the moment it becomes disrespectful from the other side, you no longer have an obligation to keep calm and nice. The willfully ignorant sometimes need a stronger push, or if you don’t feel comfortable with that, I’ve found cutting them out of your life works as a wake-up call.
Check Your Privilege
Again, white people who utter the phrase “all lives matter” are most likely unaware of the privilege that they have. White privilege does not mean that everything is handed to us on a silver platter. My parents worked very hard to rise above the financial situation they were born in, both first-generation college students, and have worked hard to provide for my brother and I. Just the same, I have worked very hard to further my education and will continue to work hard for the rest of my life. White privilege simply means that I won’t have obstacles in my way due to the color of my skin. When I walk into a store, I will not be followed for fear that I am stealing. When I walk into an elevator, no one hides their jewelry or clutches their purse. I will not be denied housing, employment, or other opportunities because I have white skin. I am not judged prematurely due to my complexion. People of color, black people especially, do not have that privilege. Teaching others what white privilege actually means is a great first step in having conversations about race. But acknowledging your privilege once isn’t where the work ends. In every conservation you have about race, you need to be aware of the biases you carry and how your words will affect those who do not look like you.
Always Continue Learning
Finally, you will need to know that you’re learning about race will never be done. You could read every book, be involved with every organization, and listen to every BIPOC testimonial out there, but you will never be done learning about the challenges they face. Keep your mind and your heart open at all times to new information, and like I said earlier, never be ashamed of being corrected. We are all human beings who need to be treated with compassion and empathy, and it is on all of us to help make the world a better and more tolerant place.
Written by Anna Dunigan