Hello Babes,

I’m tired of hearing women be down on themselves and their bodies. Your body is a gift, it is a machine that carries you through this crazy life. You need to love it and treat it with care. It’s time to get serious here on PYM…

Ladies, I’m serious. Your body is so fragile and it’s time to debunk some of these theories you have in your head about having a “perfect” body.

No one has a perfect body, not even the celebrities or Instagram influencers you swoon over. We all have our own flaws and insecurities, even the people that you think have perfect bodies also have flaws. Here’s the truth of the matter, most females have insecurities when it comes to our bodies. Thanks to society, we’ve been taught that our body + size defines our worth and beauty. Ehhh…WRONG.

Why do guys get to strive for a “dad bod” while women still feel like shit because we can’t all look like a VS model!?

First of all, beauty and size are not linear. You can be tiny and beautiful and you can be “big” and beautiful. Stop criticizing yourself and your beauty because you’re not smaller or more fit. You can always strive to be healthier and become more fit, if that’s your goal but here is a quote to think about:

“Even if you’re in the process of trying to change your body, you need to be content with what is, right here, right now. Because if you can’t be happy with yourself now, you won’t be happy with yourself ever.”

That’s the bottom line. You cannot make progress in any direction, except backwards, if you are negative.

Second point, starving yourself or eating less will not make you lose weight. It’s actually proven by science that if you want to lose weight or get fit, you should eat more. On the topic of eating, you should focus on feeding your body good food rather than restricting yourself to a diet. You may have read the post “Please Stop Going on a Diet” that was shared from Health Coach, Audrey. She discussed mindful eating rather than dieting.

Yes, you should eat clean and healthy foods but you should never restrict yourself. You can find healthy alternatives for cravings and eating chocolate or pizza from time to time is perfectly okay. You will not instantly gain 5 pounds. At the end of the day, it’s just life and life is too short to focus your energy on being perfect.

On a final note, and a very truthful note, even if you achieve your “perfect” size you will still be insecure and unhappy. Why?

Well, if you are constantly looking at yourself in a negative way, you will never be happy with yourself. (Just like that quote says) As someone who is “small”, I constantly get people telling me I’m lucky and I don’t have to worry about my body. And, although I shouldn’t, I still have bad days sometimes. My weight fluctuates constantly, I do not look the same everyday. I also still have my insecurities. Being small doesn’t remove the pressure of being perfect.

As a side note about these models we strive to look like, their job is literally their body. Their day-to-day life is taking care of their body. Most of us don’t have the time or money for that, so once again, stop wondering why you can’t look like them. Models actually end up having a lot of insecurities and body image issues. They feel so much pressure from the spotlight that it cause them to pick up bad habits or even worse, develop a disorder. Be thankful you don’t live under that kind of pressure.

So, here is my point…

If you are not happy with your body now and you not striving to make changes in a positive way, then you are only making your situation worse. You will never be happy with your body, not today and not tomorrow. Positive ways to make changes is switching to a cleaner eating routine, exercising regularly (walking and yoga count) and speaking to yourself kindly. Because you can do one and two all day long but if you still talk down on yourself, the results will never come.

I’m just tired of listening to college girls around me say they are going on a “cleanse” or starting a diet they found on Pinterest. You shouldn’t follow a cookie cutter diet or cleanse your body of necessary nutrients. What you should actually do is listen to your body and find out what works for you. But, I promise you, your body does not want to do a detox cleanse you found on Pinterest. Just do your research before you just start doing some diet. Every body is different, literally.

Look, you’re gorgeous and incredible! A scale does not measure your strengths, your character, your value or your kindness. It is simply the relationship you have with gravity! Of course I want my readers to strive to live a healthy and balanced lifestyle; but please, I beg you not to diet and restrict yourself from living a happy life. When you strive for perfection, you inhibit yourself from adventure and authentic growth. Perfection is a lie told to us by society, so stop believing in it.

When our elders are on their death beds, they do not reminisce and wish they were skinnier or dieted more in their younger days. Instead, they talk about their adventures, the high points in their lives and the love they experienced. This is my point. You can stress and worry about making yourself look perfect, but while you’re wasting precious life doing so, others are out there living their life. They are creating magical moments with real people, not caring if they’re perfect in societies eyes. Focus on making yourself happy, not others.

I promise you that when you become more positive towards yourself and towards other women, you will undergo a massive transformation. You won’t need to count your calories or think about how much you’ve eaten in a day. It will begin to come naturally because your mindset will be for a positive change rather than a grasp at perfection.

Thank you for reading PYM! I appreciate you presence today. Please, love yourself and your beautiful body. Use the hashtag #ilovemybody to spread the love and good vibes!

xo, Lyss

Photograph by Michelle Risley (Click her name to follow on Instagram)