Let’s face it, your twenties are usually a rollercoaster. You’re establishing yourself as an adult in this world and figuring out your place in it… and it’s exhausting. I think we’re all in the same boat here – we’re all just trying our best to prepare for the future and heal from the past.

Your twenties are a time for learning and growth, but the truth is that there’s no “perfect” way to spend your twenties. Some of my friends are single and dating around, while some are engaged or married. Some are diving into their career and working their way up the corporate ladder, while some are working two part-time jobs trying to figure out what career they want to pursue. And that’s all okay. I think everyone gets caught up in what they feel like they “should” be doing, and it brings about a lot of stress. The idea that you “should” be looking to settle down with a family, or that you “should” have one full-time job in your field of study is only going to drive you crazy! It does you no good to worry about where you’re at in your journey, because worry doesn’t change anything but how you feel. Instead, try shifting your perspective to remember that we all have a different life path, and that’s okay. Life is not a race! 

I asked my friends and family on Facebook who are over the age of 30 for their thoughts on this. I wanted to know, what advice do they have for people in their twenties? What do they wish they could go back and tell themselves in your twenties?

Here are their responses:

Stick to your gut intuition – Rachel

Take risks, travel, and you can never learn too much. Oh, and seek out experts and masters in topics that interest you and learn everything you can from them. – Treasa

Realize up front that not every single piece of your “plan” will work, and that’s ok. You’ll learn so much along the way that will lead you to grow into even better results than you could have anticipated. – Jennifer

Make it happen. Take the trip, move where you want, do what you love, the money will come. I have no evidence on this since I was too chicken to do a lot of it! (50 this year 😉) – Betsey

Save, save, save. Live beneath your means. Less is more and be your own best friend. Also count your blessings every day…twice. – Jody

Let go of the fear – Robb

You can do whatever you want to do. Just believe in it and create it. Follow your own path. Not someone else’s.  Put the bottle down. It will take more from you than what it will provide. Alcohol does not have up sides. Find other options of joy. Do yoga. Meditate. Trust in the universe. Everything will happen!! – Jody

Know your worth – Tierra

It is possible to be married 30 years and be more in love every year. Every day. Don’t be discouraged by what others tell you. – Lori

Be yourself, be strong willed, go forward, don’t distract yourself too much, life is without meaning if you don’t do your life mission. And what is your life mission: pursue your intuition and ask yourself everyday why are you on this Earth, how can you help, how can you be constructive. – Dimo

Focus on the dream. Head down and do the work. Start therapy for trauma.- Alaina

Don’t be afraid of mistakes. Don’t be afraid to make them. Don’t be afraid to face up to them. Don’t be afraid to accept others’ mistakes. Expect mistakes and make them your friend. Embrace them and learn from them. Whatever you do in life, you can expect mistakes. Success comes from dealing with them rather than denying them. – Meili

Love yourself. Love your body. The right partner will come when you stop looking. Enjoy life and have fun now and be grateful for what you have. – Serena

Don’t waste your time on a lousy partner, travel! And work hard to achieve your dreams – Elisa

You don’t have to compromise for the sake of a relationship. Relationships should make you feel safe not suffocated – Bhumika

Stick to the gut instinct, if a voice in your head says don’t do it, don’t do it, or, be like me and do it anyway. You will be challenged every step of the way, don’t listen to negative people, and be your own person. Create your own mantra and stick to what you believe in. Be your own person – Val

Invest in yourself first, so you can be a light to the next person in line… and start saving for future & retirement TODAY 🙂 don’t wait – Lisa

Travel as much as you can, don’t settle, don’t worry about money, stop caring what other people think of you, and learn to drink good drinks! – Dan

Everyone is different but for me, don’t wait for “the right time” to have kids. The earlier you have them, the more years you get with them. – Tony

I would tell younger me to care less about what others think & to follow my heart and do what makes my heart sing. – Sue

Travel. Go see stuff, meet people all over the world. Expand your box! Volunteer to travel to places people do not like to go. Dont stay in resorts. Keep connected to friends. Spread LOVE EVERYWHERE!! Sit at the kids table if the invite you, never turn down the opportunity to show compassion. Fast. Find a guru. Go to the Dr.! Brush your teeth and floss! Learn a foreign language but not one of the popular ones. – Scott

Go to therapy! I got to learn about I am, why I do what I do. It helped me to give myself SO much grace and actually learn to LOVE who I am. EMDR therapy was huge for me. Travel! By this I mean backpack, stay in Airbnb rooms in other people’s houses; stay in hostels, try to survive on less than $50 a day. Talk to locals, immerse yourself in things that aren’t just tourist attractions. Experience other cultures and people. I am the happiest me when I am dirty, tired, hungry, out of my comfort zone and in total bliss in another country across the world. Self care is actually important. It is not selfish to take care of your self. Again, it is not selfish to take care of yourself. It’s not only okay to say no to a birthday party or a night out, it’s showing yourself love. Figure out how you learn. It sounds silly, but for years I struggled in school until I figured out that I am not an auditory learner, but visual and tactile. You won’t always feel this insecure about yourself, personality and body. You will keep growing and learn to love yourself. Every scar, stretch mark, emotional trauma, or “blemish” will some day just be another part of a body and mind you love. It’s okay to outgrow friends. If they aren’t on the same path as you or are intentionally halting your growth, it’s okay to cut ties. It’s good to have boundaries, even (and especially) with family. DNA doesn’t make a family. – Melany

I know I found some great advice in there, and I hope something stands out as relevant advice to you. Thanks for reading, I hope you have a great rest of your day!

Lauren

Written by Lauren Sadowski | It’s Gonna Be Okay